When To Agree To Not Agree?

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Posted By Gabby Moody

At the start of a relationship, impression is everything and many tend to only display personal characteristics favourable to the relationship. To guarantee the growth of a pair’s relationship, both need to feel wanted, validated, appreciated and admired.

Conflicts are inevitable and will happen in relations. The key is how to address them suitably, or they may spiral out of control. Unfortunately, conflict resolutions can be complicated.

Conflict resolution skills are not inherited but learned.

Thus many couples do not foretell any danger signals that may cause a couple to split up.

Constant disparage of a partner’s faults or ignoring the argument, instead of finding a suitable way of discussing the problem in a constructive and calm way, could spell danger in a relationship.

The most important thing for couples to understand is how they feel about the situation and the reason why they feel that way. This can be thought provoking and bring up many issues, some deeper than others but could be useful.
For a pair to straighten out their differences, they should listen carefully to each other as it’s just as critical voicing ones own feelings.

Listening, though tricky not to interrupt, is an important facet of learning effective conflict resolution techniques.

Listening, is to listen honestly, not fuelling the mind with a come back reply.

Listening is a good skill to have. It can assist with closing the gap between couples to find out where the issue could be.

Understanding the partner’s point of view might be difficult to agree with but vital to at least acknowledge.
Just listening to each other without interruption gives both people a sense that their feelings have been validated.

Be forth coming about expressing feelings. Avoid defensive comments and show appreciation of the partner’s feelings.
Expressing the wrong thing can escalate the conflict further. It’s important to communicate feelings, rather than focusing on what the other has done wrong. ‘I feel’ sentences work better than pointing the blame.
In most situations couples can work on a reasonable solution. They’d meet half way, compromise or just agree to not agree and go on. Put the significance of the relationship before a conflict and work together to achieve a positive outcome.

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